The painful circle of life.

We found out today that my uncle Jack passed away. My mother was really upset. We knew it was coming, as he had a brain tumor which was not operable.
My sister Judy and I will drive my mother up to say goodbye to her brother one last time.
He was always bright and cheery with us. As a kid, we went to the bay area many times. I only remember his house and family. I can't remember many sites clearly. Only the street, lined with overhanging trees on both sides on slanted hillsides, leading up to his driveway. I remember him doing cannon balls into their pool. His Donald Duck voice was better than the original. Even loosing to him on the billiards table was a memorable experience. Although, I don't think he ever let me actually loose. He taught me bank shots because they were fun.
I never kept in touch with him or any of his family as an adult. And now, I feel contacting them would be like an empty facade. I only really realized what was going on when I started writing this. My mother is sad. Deeply sad, and that is what tears at me. I can't stand to see her sad. She said that Jack wanted to "swim with the dolphins". I told her that if he was Hindu or Buddhist, he might come back as a dolphin (as a joke). She laughed and sighed, "he will swim with the dolphins. I know there is nothing that can stop him now".
It may sound weird. But, what I feel most is the dread of having to go through what my cousins are going through now. I don't want to loose my parents. But I know that some day they will leave this world. I just hope it is without pain and surrounded by love. They deserve this much. I hope the next world is a blessed place where they will be taken care of. I miss them already.. I think I will wrestle with my Dad tonight (he's 86). He laughs when we wrestle. I let him push me around and he yells for mom to look... Mom, look what your son is doing to me...
I love my family.