Pancreatic Cancer Action Network Symposium - LA

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In Memoriam - Joseph Hoffman

Joseph Hoffman - July, 1919 through August, 2008.

My father had a great, full life. He was a devoted husband to his wife of 54 years, a loving and supportive brother to his 4 siblings and their families, and a father whose dedication to his kids can not be described by words.

As co-founder and president of Burbank Aircraft Supply, he made a name for himself in that industry due to his honesty, integrity and incredible work ethic.

After more than 15 years of retirement, we still hear from people in the industry who remember him with fondness.

In the course of his life, he traveled to many countries to help customers as much as he could. He learned a lot and, when he could, included his children in his work and travels.

He even let his children barge in on his weekly board of director's meetings (poker games), to enjoy the wonderful deli platters they would buy. He even let his son (me) sit on his lap and help him make corporate decisions (should I call or raise?).

His poker buddies often joked that they paid for the pool!

Dad was also a world class joker. I learned this when I was finally invited to join him and his "boosum" buddy Dick (the Bake) Baker for lunch. It was hard to eat with a belly in pain from laughter. The two of them would play off each other in a way more entertaining than any comedian I have seen. They could have put Burns and Allen out of business.

I was also fortunate to be invited to join him and my Uncle Eggy (Ed Vertel) in their quite inventive method of playing golf. You see, they figured out quite quickly that keeping score got in the way of having fun. So they created their own scoring method. This involved comparing the number of balls you have when you enter the course to the number you had when you left. If you left with more balls than you came with, that's points. Also, when you hit a bad shot, cracking the best joke about it would nullify the stroke, or something like that. We would always go to lunch after and laugh hysterically.

Both the Bake and Eggy left this world before Dad. They will be waiting for him, I know.

He had a tough fight toward the end, but maintained his sense of humor almost to the last week. Even when in pain, he would crack jokes and make us laugh.

He passed at home surrounded by love. My Mom, myself and my incredible wife, sisters Terri, Judy, Carol, Lori and Peggy made sure he was never alone. My sister's hubby's were also an incredible help and made Dad very proud of my sisters' decision making. My brother (I am dropping the "in-law" part) Marc, showed us how selfless he really is. I can't express my gratitude for being part of this family. My other brother (also dropping the "in-law" part) Luis has also been an amazing part of our family, helping my parents more than we ever thought possible for many years now.

My wife Zoe, what can I say... She built a relationship with my parents that I never expected. She was there with me to help in more situations than I could have asked her to. She is amazing.

But, no one, and I mean no one, showed the mettle of my sister Judy. After what she went through with the loss of her husband, the dedication and hard work she put in with my Dad was truly inspiring.

All of us did everything we could. And I mean that. Even Lori's and Carol's children put up with lost time with their mommies to let them help my Dad. The kids even came to visit and made my Dad soooo happy to see them.

My extended family in the area were also unbelievable.
A special thanks to cousin Yael and her husband Andrew for making time for us when they came to California, to introduce my Dad to their son Yoni.
Cousin Les and Debbie both stopped by. Leslie prayed with my Dad and held his hand even in a very bad time. Debbie made Chicken soup and brought baked goods.
It meant the world to him. It makes me feel bad that I so often neglected to keep in touch with you all on a regular basis. Something I hope to remedy in the future.

My love to all of you. And a special thanks to my Dad's younger brother Mort and his wife Auntie Aviva for traveling so far to visit while he was still alert. That visit put him in a good mood that lasted a week after they left.

If you knew my Dad, please feel free to leave a message or a story about him.

Thank you all!
Peace and Love to everyone.

In honor of my Dad, please to not send flowers. If you wish to make a donation to a cancer related charity or research fund, or to Doctors without Borders, please do so.

Poetry -- if you can call it that - A Spider On My Ceiling

A Spider On My Ceiling

There's a spider on my ceiling now, as I lie in bed awake, twelve thirty-one
and he's yet to spin this web of evening sleep.

From wall to wall he searches long for that place he will call his home.

Frantically, in confusion and haste, he passes over a thousand sites where home could surely be made.

Still he searches on past night till dawn.

From weariness, his pace has slowed and his spirit seems to have faded.

He found his home in time to spin that final web, not to move again.

His body stands for that search that only ends when one escapes.

Daniel M. Hoffman
06/03/92

Handy tip for caring for sick ones.

As some of you know, my dad is very sick right now. My sisters and I are doing our best to care for him at home, but run into many challenges, for which our health care team had no answers. One such problem was how to let my dad call us when he needs help. They only had a bed alarm that alerts you if the patient tries to get up. After thinking for a while, and trying a couple other unsuccessful ideas, I had a great idea.

I went to my local hardware store and bought a Heath Zenith Wireless Doorbell.
I taped one of the buttons to the safety rails of his bed. Instant hospital call button. It works a little too well.

I will post more later.
ADG