Waste and Environmental concerns at Starbucks

A personal report.

While I don't go to Starbucks on a regular basis, I do pop in once in a while for a latte on break from work. For the last two months, I have been paying close attention to the barristas and still can't believe what I discovered.

Wasted Shots.

Whenever they made a drink with an odd number of shots, they would simply let the odd shot run down the drain. Maybe you have seen their method? Each esspresso head has two spouts. If you have a drink with 2 shots, they place your cup directly under the head to catch one shot from each spout. If you only need one shot, they would place your cup off to the side, catching only one shot from one spout. You would think they would put another cup under the other spout to catch the stray shot?

NO. They calously and carelessly let the shot drain off into the sewers. This is a precious commodity that some farmer worked hard to grow, just tossed aside like trash.

Starbucks worked hard to create a new coffee culture in America, where people valued coffee. But what value does it have when it is in the sewer? I will tell you.

Caffeine in the wild.

Over the past ten years, I have noticed a sharp drop in the number of wild sewer aligator sightings in the LA area. I always thought this was due to a combination of public education about the dangers of releasing pet aligator infants and a great effort in animal control. However, the truth seems more insidious. Imagine if you will, a host of wild sewer aligators fed a steady stream of caffeine from a plethora of Starbucks dumping shots into the sewer all day long. These hopped up gators would have extremely hightened senses. Their senses are so hightened that nary a animal control agent could get within a mile of them. Granted, they are skinny and pale gators, but a danger non the less. Especially dangerous are the hours between Starbucks closing and opening the next day. Such a gator going through caffeine withdrawls is not a sight I want to witness in person.

Solution.

Whenever you visit Starbucks and see the barrista wasting a shot, ask them if they can catch that extra shot and put it in your drink. It will save a gator and make the American workforce that much more productive. And it might also increase the sale of anti depressant drugs and sleep aids.

Young Hawk Down

North Hollywood, CA.

In a fit of depression over not getting a ticket to the Michael Jackson memorial at Staples Center today, a young hawk flew a kamikaze mission into the front window of a home in the Valley Village area of North Hollywood at approximately 7:15PM. The home owner dried to give aid but the depressed hawk refused her attempts to help, even threatening to "nip her finger off" if she didn't let the hawk die. Emergency services were called and a medical rescue worker was forced to call in a bird psychologist to talk the suicidal bird down before medical attention could be administered. The emergency workers were very concerned and mentioned this was the fifth such issue today.

"We new birds loved music, but had no idea they would react this way to Jackson's passing" said one medic.

"Birds have complex psyches and understand more about our world than most people realize", said the bird psychologist who was called to talk the bird down.

"We have been seeing a trend in bird suicide attempts since the King of Pop passed away. Most end in tragedy. Luckily, this bird has a good chance at recovery with the proper therapy and drug regimine.", said Sneznblo.

Sadly, this may not be the last member of our society drawn into depression so deep it renders them incapable of leading a normal life due to the undue media attention paid to the singer's passing. These are the uncalculable costs of the media circus that has been keeping us informed of ever minor detail possibly related to the unfortunate and untimely death of Michael Jackson.

DMH News service -